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Are People Who Try Internet Dating Scared Of Talking To People?
A few years ago I recall the looks of pity my friend Jennifer would get when she mentioned she'd been trying online dating sites. I must admit, at the time, I thought she must be desperate; couldn't she meet anyone in 'real' life? Didn't she ever talk to people at work or at parties?
I judged her actions and concluded that she must be either a bit weird or socially inept. Of course, you know I wouldn't be telling you all this if she had never met anyone...sure enough, she met a guy online and fell in love. He didn't live in Bahrain either, he lived in her town!
Just one experience like this in your own group of friends can make you question your hasty judgments. So, could online dating really be the answer? Or, is best to just stick with the traditional method of meeting people, even though it hasn't worked out for you yet?
Well, let's say you're busy all day at work (nobody eligible there), you go out twice a week with your usual group of friends (been there, dated them), and the rest of the time you're washing dishes, doing laundry, cleaning your home (or more likely a combination of Facebook, TV and surfing the net); realistically, how many new 'dateable' people are you likely to meet?
Even if you met one new person a week, how many of those are likely to strike up any kind of connection with? One in a hundred? At that rate, it would take a couple of years to meet someone you could fall for. Not bad, but, in the meantime, you've spent two years alone!
So, what if you want to speed up the process? You do the sensible thing and search a database of millions of people on a dating site. Isn't it still a bit like shopping for a laptop on Amazon?! Isn't it less 'real' than bumping into someone at a party?
Is sending someone a message any less 'real' than saying it directly to them? Be honest, which do you do more of these days? Be even more honest, which mode of communication would you prefer when meeting someone for the first time? This was the main factor that converted me.
Talking to a person you've never met before that you like the look of is hard! Actually, initiating communication is way easier through online dating sites. No more nervous chat-up lines and stuttered introductions. You get to think about what you say and how you're coming across. You don't have to worry about blushing or sweating or your mouth going dry.
To summarize, a long time ago, online dating appeared to me like a last resort for lonely people. Now though, I'm convinced that it's definitely the best place to start. Let's say you meet ten new people per week through online dating sites - even if only 1 turns out to be eligible, you've increased your chances of meeting someone by over 1000! You can't argue with that!
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